Platinum Clubhouse Newbridge, Co.Kildare, Ireland.
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March 2003 Newsletter


Enjoy the read and keep in touch.

If anyone has any articles or comments they would like to submit please e-mail them to us at:

Poetry Corner

Platinum Clubhouse

Who ever you are
and who you might be
attending the clubhouse
is a place you can be free.

Learning new skills and
dealing with life
you’ll find your path
and you’ll begin to strive.

The people you met and get
to know
are the people you’ll remember
which fights off being alone.

So happiness creeps in
and joy does return
and you’ll feel glad
in knowing the lessons
you have learned


Racing News

The Cheltenham Festival

In four weeks time thousands of Irish Race Fans will make the yearly journey to England for the Cheltenham Racing Festival. This is the clash of the two old rivals Ireland and England. During the course of the three days money will be lost and won and there will be tears of joy and despair.

The three big Races are on Tuesday the Champion Hurdle on Wednesday the Queen Mother Champion Chase and on Thursday we have the Tote Cheltenham Gold Cup. My tips for the big races are Flame Creek in the Champion Hurdle Moscow Flyer in the Queen Mother Champion Chase and Best Mate in the Tote Cheltenham Gold Cup. I also predict that Ruby Walsh be top Jockey at the Festival and that Davy Russell will ride his first winner at the Festival this year So roll on March 11 and the start of the best three days National Hunt racing of the year


Employment and Education Unit

The Employment unit has seen many changes over the past few months. new furniture, new Computer and printer photocopier and many little bits and pieces some people get a buzz out of buying.

Well after saying all of that this unit is the place to come if you have the desire for work or Education because here is where people work together actively looking for work, and share all their experiences some good and some not so good. But we all have one goal and that is Employment or to further education.

Well done to all members who continue in their employment, some members have increased their hours per week, some members have gained permanent employment. Garry has changed from one T/E to another T/E and has gained extra hours per week. He is having full time job coaching. Well done to Gary and good luck.

Tony, Patsy, and Angela have commenced a basic computer course. Philip has commenced a computer course in Desk Top Publishing to help out with the newsletter. Good Luck to them all. Michael has completed in the final stage of his cert course in culinary. Well done to Michael. He now awaits the results at the end of March. Siobhan is completing her second year in Art and Design, Well done Siobhan.

Last but not least we must not forget Siobhra and Tom who completed a course in Employment. And Carmel who is still studying First Line Management and will take her exams in May, good luck Carmel.

Breda says goodbye to the employment unit at the end of March for a short period. I enjoyed my Time in Employment, made some mistakes and learned from some and gained lots of experience from Carmel. Look forward to returning in the near future.

The Employment Unit.

Jokes and Gags

Q What am I?

Through a rock,
through a reel
Through an old spinning wheel
Through a bag of feathers
Through an old mud wa
If that's not a riddle
There's no riddle at all.

A: A moth.

Q Which fish go to heaven when they die?
A: Angelfish.

Q What did the man do when he thought he was dying?
A: Moved into the living room.

Q Why is a belt like a dustcart?
A: Because it goes around the waist.

Q Why was the farmer cross?
A: Because someone walked on his corn.

Q Why did the man throw his watch out the window?
A: To see time fly.

Q What is the longest night of the year?
A: A fortnight.

Q What has four eyes and a mouth?
A: The missippippi.

Q Where do bees keep their money?
A: In a honey box.

Q What makes the Tower of Pisa lean?
A: It doesn’t eat much.

Q What did the hat say to the scarf?
A: You hang along and I'll go ahead.

Q What is the best food for athletes?
A: Runner Beans.

Q How would you know a Kerry farmer?
A: He would be standing in another man's field.

Q Where would you weigh a whale?
A: In a weigh station.

Q What can run but can’t walk?
A: Water.

Q What's the best thing to take into a desert?
A: A thirst-aid kit.

Q What type of house weighs the least?
A: A lighthouse.

Q How does a fireplace feel when you fill it with coal?
A: Grate-full.

Q Why are fish makers so mean?
A: Because their job makes them sell fish.

Q. How do you use an Egyptian doorbell?
A: Toot and come in.

Q What kind of cat lives in the ocean?
A: An octopus.

Q What does the postman take to vampires?
A: Fang mail.

Q What did the cannibal say to the explorer?
A: Nice to be meat you

Q What does a vegetarian cannibal eat?
A: Swedes.

Q Why did boy close his eyes in front of the mirror?
A: He wanted to see what he looked like when he was asleep.

Q Name two animals that give milk?
A: None do-you take it from them.

Q What can you see and feel but can’ t touch?
A: The sun.


Saint Patrick, Patron Saint of Ireland

Saint Patrick was born in Scotland. Patrick was kidnapped at the age of sixteen, and taken to Ireland, where he was sold into slavery. He learned all of the ways of his Irish captors, and developed a deep– rooted belief and trust in God. In a dream he was told how to escape. He left Ireland, and returned to his family in Scotland. He studied for the priesthood and worked until he became a bishop. It was at this time that he was assigned to return to Ireland. Back in Ireland, Patrick performed many miracles, and converted many people to the Catholic faith. In his teaching, Patrick used the Shamrock to demonstrate the belief of three persons in one God, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Thus the Shamrock became the symbol of the Irish Catholic Faith. The Feast day of Saint Patrick is celebrated on the 17th of March each year, at home and abroad. It is also the day he died and returned to God. We hope that all the members of Platinum Clubhouse, and Clubhouse’s all over the world have a lovely Saint Patrick’s Day. At this time of year, we think also of all the Irish People who are Living and Working all over the World.


Get Well wishes to: All our members who are unwell.

Birthday Wishes to: Bob, Patrick W, Patricia D, Annette, Peter, Ita, and Siobhra.

Welcome to our new members: Justin, Amgelina, Tony, Elizabeth, and Ann.

The views, opinions and beliefs expressed in this newsletter are not necessarily the views of Platinum Clubhouse. Any articles, items or pictures in this newsletter may only be reproduced following permission from Platinum Clubhouse.

Stephen, Breda, Patricia, Siobhan, Andrew, Siobhra, Bob and Tom.

Editorial Team:


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